In case I forgot when my wedding was, theknot.com just sent me a reminder email. Just checking to make sure you haven't forgotten it...
It hadn't really occured to me how soon this wedding is. I mean, in my head, it seems like a lifetime away. That I'll get around to planning things when it gets closer. I'm just brainstorming, right? I don't have to make any decisions.... right?
Luckily, things are fitting together like a Sudoku puzzle. It's a little complicated at first and it takes a little staring at, but once you get 4 or so numbers in, then BLAM! It all comes to you and you've got it figured out. Weddings seem to be about the same. Just look at it for awhile in your head and soon enough, all the pieces will fall perfectly together and be just want you invisioned. That makes me happy. I'm sure that other people aren't as lucky, or that even people in my own family are thinking my ideas are too unique and far-fetched, but really? Who's wedding is this anyway? As long as my future husband and I are happy, I don't know that it really matters.
So what do we have picked out? The suits, the dresses, the gifts, the colors, the date, the place (which includes food and drinks), and a myriad of other little things. I like it. A lot!
Other than that. I don't have much new news. I seem to never be able to stay in the same place for more than a couple weeks. I'm heading all over the midwest again for the holiday season. Yay for family!
In case I don't get back to the blog before the holidays,
Have A Great And Wonderful Season My Friends!
Friday, December 19, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Everything You Ever Wanted To Know
Here is the list of updates:
1. The Peace Corps idea fell through. I got a call some odd number of weeks ago and basically they only thing they had to tell me was that they just aren't getting the funding they thought they would have and although I have recognizable skills, I'm just not experienced enough. They apparently want people who are more trained than I am so they don't have to spend that extra money. You know? I kinda saw it coming, but I have to admit that I was definitely a little more than disheartened. It's one thing to tell your self it might not work and set guidelines as to when to pull my application. It's completely different when they call and tell you it's over.
2. Because of the Peace Corps, I'm living at home. And fighting the other 533,000 Americans for jobs. Boo.
3. I'm ENGAGED! That's right. You heard me. ENGAGED! The love of my life, my soulmate, my dreamer, asked me to marry him. And of course I said "YES!" Ok, so there was some excited tears and lots of hugging, but I said yes and so here I sit. ENGAGED! This actually happened the Monday before Thanksgiving, but for some reason, my blogging capabilities have been lacking. My apologies.
4. Wedding planning is way fun! I'm having lots of fun getting ideas and things. I like trying on dresses, picking out colors, etc. I just kinda wish that those who say it's my wedding and therefore is only up to me and my groom to make decisions, could take their own advice. Everyone... and I seriously mean EVERYONE comes up with ideas to give you about your wedding and then just after they hound you for about 20 minutes on what you "should" do, they tell you, "... but it doesn't matter what you do, it's your wedding. I just think this is something that would be a good idea for you." Right. And how is it that EVERYONE says that? Don't they remember getting married and having the same problem? So why pay a bad tradition forward?
That may be my update for tonight. That supposably covers the last 4-7 weeks or more of my life. I know, blamed boring. I get stuff.
Enjoy!
1. The Peace Corps idea fell through. I got a call some odd number of weeks ago and basically they only thing they had to tell me was that they just aren't getting the funding they thought they would have and although I have recognizable skills, I'm just not experienced enough. They apparently want people who are more trained than I am so they don't have to spend that extra money. You know? I kinda saw it coming, but I have to admit that I was definitely a little more than disheartened. It's one thing to tell your self it might not work and set guidelines as to when to pull my application. It's completely different when they call and tell you it's over.
2. Because of the Peace Corps, I'm living at home. And fighting the other 533,000 Americans for jobs. Boo.
3. I'm ENGAGED! That's right. You heard me. ENGAGED! The love of my life, my soulmate, my dreamer, asked me to marry him. And of course I said "YES!" Ok, so there was some excited tears and lots of hugging, but I said yes and so here I sit. ENGAGED! This actually happened the Monday before Thanksgiving, but for some reason, my blogging capabilities have been lacking. My apologies.
4. Wedding planning is way fun! I'm having lots of fun getting ideas and things. I like trying on dresses, picking out colors, etc. I just kinda wish that those who say it's my wedding and therefore is only up to me and my groom to make decisions, could take their own advice. Everyone... and I seriously mean EVERYONE comes up with ideas to give you about your wedding and then just after they hound you for about 20 minutes on what you "should" do, they tell you, "... but it doesn't matter what you do, it's your wedding. I just think this is something that would be a good idea for you." Right. And how is it that EVERYONE says that? Don't they remember getting married and having the same problem? So why pay a bad tradition forward?
That may be my update for tonight. That supposably covers the last 4-7 weeks or more of my life. I know, blamed boring. I get stuff.
Enjoy!
Friday, November 7, 2008
In Need Of A Nice Padded Room
In my extended hiatus on blogging, I still have no answers. Things are really mixed up right now and I haven't been able to figure it out. No updates from the Peace Corps... which means I've given myself a deadline of when to bail out. I don't want to give up on it, but I'm nearing that point because it's hard to trust that with the lack of communication I have now when I have all the ammenities of modern living that it will be any better when I need to train my own carrier pigeon. It's rough, but I'm at peace with it. Instead I'm waiting, albeit impatiently, to find out if I have any interviews with places I've applied down in Des Moines. No news. Just waiting. And I'm finding myself to be with a very prominent lack of enthusiasm and motivation right now. It'll work out. I just need time.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Sweet Flowing Music Through My Soul
It's happened again. I had to say good-bye to my love. Shortly after my last blog, my wonderfully amazing boyfriend came to visit and we went on a surprise road trip to Northern Wisconsin to see some of his family. These visits keep getting shorter and shorter and further and further apart from each other. This really is harder than I thought it would be. So, yes, he left again. He had is "real" job to get back to. Haha. I'm kidding. I love that he's got something that he is passionate about and does whole-heartedly. He needs that.
But I'm going to miss him dearly.
And all of a sudden this week has included just as much travel as my month of September. Except not such far distances. We were in Eastern Minnesota on Tuesday, Northern Wisconsin on Wednesday, back to Central Wisconsin on Thursday. Then tomorrow it's to Southeast Wisconsin for a STATE MARCHING BAND CHAMPIONSHIP COMPETITION!! I'm really excited for that. Didn't know if you missed my enthusiasm. YAY!!
Yet, as I type this, I'm sad and listening to a song that everyone should hear at least once if not a thousand times in their life. I suggest everyone quick hit Youtube or iTunes and look for "River Flows In You" by Yiruma. My sister has been playing this on the piano and I'm in love with it. It is just the right balance of happy and sad. It's romantic. The story behind it is that it is also called "Bella's Lullaby". Bella as in the character in Stephanie Meyer's novels in the Twilight Series. It is talked about in almost every book in the series and is in the movie based on the first book that comes out in November. I had no intention of reading the book, but my sister talked me into it and although I'm well out of the intended target audience for the book, it is one that I loved.
And on my last note before I go lose in tennis with my best friend and her mom, I want to see if anyone knows if the street on Highway 8 in Wisconsin curiously named 24 3/8th Street is similar to Harry Potter's Platform 9 3/4. Do you suppose that if I'd have taken that street, I'd end up in a mythical world full of enchanting creatures and endless magic?
But I'm going to miss him dearly.
And all of a sudden this week has included just as much travel as my month of September. Except not such far distances. We were in Eastern Minnesota on Tuesday, Northern Wisconsin on Wednesday, back to Central Wisconsin on Thursday. Then tomorrow it's to Southeast Wisconsin for a STATE MARCHING BAND CHAMPIONSHIP COMPETITION!! I'm really excited for that. Didn't know if you missed my enthusiasm. YAY!!
Yet, as I type this, I'm sad and listening to a song that everyone should hear at least once if not a thousand times in their life. I suggest everyone quick hit Youtube or iTunes and look for "River Flows In You" by Yiruma. My sister has been playing this on the piano and I'm in love with it. It is just the right balance of happy and sad. It's romantic. The story behind it is that it is also called "Bella's Lullaby". Bella as in the character in Stephanie Meyer's novels in the Twilight Series. It is talked about in almost every book in the series and is in the movie based on the first book that comes out in November. I had no intention of reading the book, but my sister talked me into it and although I'm well out of the intended target audience for the book, it is one that I loved.
And on my last note before I go lose in tennis with my best friend and her mom, I want to see if anyone knows if the street on Highway 8 in Wisconsin curiously named 24 3/8th Street is similar to Harry Potter's Platform 9 3/4. Do you suppose that if I'd have taken that street, I'd end up in a mythical world full of enchanting creatures and endless magic?
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
What Did You Say?!
I need to work on my writing consistency. Right? This last little hiatus is explained (or excused) by saying that by the time I get around to signing into my blog account, I've lost all my patience with the internet that moves the speed of government change. Even grass grows faster.
Anyway.
This last week I've had a few opportunites to work on my speaking skills. In high school, I used to love the competition public speaking club and activities. I loved talking to people. And as much as I did presentations for classes in college, it has never been the same.
Let's just say it's been awhile.
Starting with my volunteering to speak at a high school class on options available in college and after college, such as ROTC and the Peace Corps, it was very obvious that I hadn't done a presentation in a LONG time. Granted, I want to put it out there that I don't think this one went as well for a couple reasons. It's hard for me to talk about those topics with a bunch of high schoolers because I quit ROTC and the Peace Corps isn't an after high school option for them. The other thing is that I really had anticipated much more participation from them and that was quite lacking. Just practice for the Peace Corps I guess....
I was also asked to talk to one of the Bible Study classes at my church over the weekend. This one was maybe a little easier because I'm very involved with my topics. I hold them very near and dear to my heart. A week ago, one of the women in this bunch approached me and asked if I would be willing to talk about how I knew the PC was right for me. Their lesson that day had been on how God talks to us, but how it isn't is ways that are blatantly obvious.
I'm going to take a little detour here and talk about my faith. This is hard for me and I know that not everyone wants to read this sort of thing, but I have to say this is important for me, now that I know what to say.
I grew up in a household that made it seem that attending church was not an option. I must admit, I learned a lot, had lots of fun, and it really helped me become the compassionate person I feel that I am. But as soon as I was able to, I really felt I needed to become more aware of the other religions around me. I've never wanted to convert to anything else, but I just want to know about them. It goes into my belief that the reason there is so much discord in the world is because although everyone needs something to believe in, they are so focused on it that they refuse to see and learn about everyone else's. So when I left for college, it was left up to me to go to church and I no longer felt like it wasn't an option. It was MY choice.
Here's my secret. I didn't like the churches down there. I didn't like how they made me feel. I never felt inspired by them. I didn't feel like I was growing with them.
So of course it hurt my family when they would ask how church was and I would respond with, "I didn't go." But it gave me even more inspiration to learn even more about the world around me. I took classes on modern and traditional religious and world religions. I was so happy. It gave me a way to feel I was still advancing my education and beliefs at the same time. No, it wasn't church, but I felt okay with that.
Then I went through a phase that I was just content. I knew what I believed in and that was that. The hard part about it was when my family told me that I needed to not only believe it, but act upon it. They were worried that I'd given up on my faith. And you know what? I was almost tempted to let them believe that. Why couldn't they just be happy for me and all I'd learned? How hard is it to let me be with my faith and accept that the picture I've got in my eyes is different than the one in yours? Apparently, that was hard and WAY too much to ask for.
Maybe that was just it. I think I just answered my own question. The pictures and images in my head weren't theirs. Unique unto my own.
So how did I know the Peace Corps was where I belonged? It fit into my picture.
Now that I'm back at home, I've taken up teaching Sunday School. It's got its difficulties, but really. I'm happy with it. So when this woman approached me to talk at her Bible Study too, I jumped at the chance, hoping I could explain myself. I also took picture from my recent vacation to help me voice my images of faith. I'm not sure where I lost it, but once I started crying my eyes out, I noticed that a lot of other people in that room had too. I'm sorry to make everyone cry. It's hard not to when you feel so strongly about something.
I was also going to throw something in here about past speeches that I've had to make. And how they really didn't encompass what I wanted them too. Especially about this one. I could have said so much at my friend's wedding, but instead I kept it short. I'll just let you know, R, I think I could have broke down in tears there too. You rock and I'm so blessed to have you as a friend. A friend for so long. Thanks.
Ok. So, I apparently had a lot to talk about on this one. Who knows about the next one, but thanks for listening. I'll make the next one shorter.
Anyway.
This last week I've had a few opportunites to work on my speaking skills. In high school, I used to love the competition public speaking club and activities. I loved talking to people. And as much as I did presentations for classes in college, it has never been the same.
Let's just say it's been awhile.
Starting with my volunteering to speak at a high school class on options available in college and after college, such as ROTC and the Peace Corps, it was very obvious that I hadn't done a presentation in a LONG time. Granted, I want to put it out there that I don't think this one went as well for a couple reasons. It's hard for me to talk about those topics with a bunch of high schoolers because I quit ROTC and the Peace Corps isn't an after high school option for them. The other thing is that I really had anticipated much more participation from them and that was quite lacking. Just practice for the Peace Corps I guess....
I was also asked to talk to one of the Bible Study classes at my church over the weekend. This one was maybe a little easier because I'm very involved with my topics. I hold them very near and dear to my heart. A week ago, one of the women in this bunch approached me and asked if I would be willing to talk about how I knew the PC was right for me. Their lesson that day had been on how God talks to us, but how it isn't is ways that are blatantly obvious.
I'm going to take a little detour here and talk about my faith. This is hard for me and I know that not everyone wants to read this sort of thing, but I have to say this is important for me, now that I know what to say.
I grew up in a household that made it seem that attending church was not an option. I must admit, I learned a lot, had lots of fun, and it really helped me become the compassionate person I feel that I am. But as soon as I was able to, I really felt I needed to become more aware of the other religions around me. I've never wanted to convert to anything else, but I just want to know about them. It goes into my belief that the reason there is so much discord in the world is because although everyone needs something to believe in, they are so focused on it that they refuse to see and learn about everyone else's. So when I left for college, it was left up to me to go to church and I no longer felt like it wasn't an option. It was MY choice.
Here's my secret. I didn't like the churches down there. I didn't like how they made me feel. I never felt inspired by them. I didn't feel like I was growing with them.
So of course it hurt my family when they would ask how church was and I would respond with, "I didn't go." But it gave me even more inspiration to learn even more about the world around me. I took classes on modern and traditional religious and world religions. I was so happy. It gave me a way to feel I was still advancing my education and beliefs at the same time. No, it wasn't church, but I felt okay with that.
Then I went through a phase that I was just content. I knew what I believed in and that was that. The hard part about it was when my family told me that I needed to not only believe it, but act upon it. They were worried that I'd given up on my faith. And you know what? I was almost tempted to let them believe that. Why couldn't they just be happy for me and all I'd learned? How hard is it to let me be with my faith and accept that the picture I've got in my eyes is different than the one in yours? Apparently, that was hard and WAY too much to ask for.
Maybe that was just it. I think I just answered my own question. The pictures and images in my head weren't theirs. Unique unto my own.
So how did I know the Peace Corps was where I belonged? It fit into my picture.
Now that I'm back at home, I've taken up teaching Sunday School. It's got its difficulties, but really. I'm happy with it. So when this woman approached me to talk at her Bible Study too, I jumped at the chance, hoping I could explain myself. I also took picture from my recent vacation to help me voice my images of faith. I'm not sure where I lost it, but once I started crying my eyes out, I noticed that a lot of other people in that room had too. I'm sorry to make everyone cry. It's hard not to when you feel so strongly about something.
I was also going to throw something in here about past speeches that I've had to make. And how they really didn't encompass what I wanted them too. Especially about this one. I could have said so much at my friend's wedding, but instead I kept it short. I'll just let you know, R, I think I could have broke down in tears there too. You rock and I'm so blessed to have you as a friend. A friend for so long. Thanks.
Ok. So, I apparently had a lot to talk about on this one. Who knows about the next one, but thanks for listening. I'll make the next one shorter.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Updates
I hate hate HATE leaving. It is so hard to say goodbye.
That's my first update. Kind of. I've "officially" moved back to Wisconsin. Or, at least I permanently get my mail sent there. I knew that it would be hard to leave, but I never quite realized how hard. Makes sense though. And I might as well get used to it, I mean, I'm leaving the country.... THAT'S RIGHT! I got my Peace Corps Medical Clearance today!!!
Granted, that is just one more step in the everlasting process to be invited to another country, but it is a big one. It means that my file is now being passed on to the Placement Officers out there to match me to a country. I actually just talked to one of the Reps in the area and he gave me some hope too, but also reminded me that the PC is starting to cut back in huge numbers. So now I rest in limbo yet again, but in a different place. Just waiting again.
I want to also comment on another person. I am hurt by their immaturity and childish attitudes, but I've come to terms with the fact that not everyone is my friend to just be my friend. It would seem that even those you've been close to for years are merely on a mission to get something in return other than just friendship. I can't say that I appreciate the drunk dialing at 1, 3, AND 4 in the morning. Go out and get stupid. Go out and do whatever you want to prove to yourself that you are the better person, but please, don't prove yourself to me by calling me and hanging up at the most unreal hours of the morning. Get a grip and grow up.
And I'm looking for inspiration for my Sunday School class. And looking for jobs. And looking to relax. And looking to spend time with my loved ones. Work in progress.
Work in progress.
That's my first update. Kind of. I've "officially" moved back to Wisconsin. Or, at least I permanently get my mail sent there. I knew that it would be hard to leave, but I never quite realized how hard. Makes sense though. And I might as well get used to it, I mean, I'm leaving the country.... THAT'S RIGHT! I got my Peace Corps Medical Clearance today!!!
Granted, that is just one more step in the everlasting process to be invited to another country, but it is a big one. It means that my file is now being passed on to the Placement Officers out there to match me to a country. I actually just talked to one of the Reps in the area and he gave me some hope too, but also reminded me that the PC is starting to cut back in huge numbers. So now I rest in limbo yet again, but in a different place. Just waiting again.
I want to also comment on another person. I am hurt by their immaturity and childish attitudes, but I've come to terms with the fact that not everyone is my friend to just be my friend. It would seem that even those you've been close to for years are merely on a mission to get something in return other than just friendship. I can't say that I appreciate the drunk dialing at 1, 3, AND 4 in the morning. Go out and get stupid. Go out and do whatever you want to prove to yourself that you are the better person, but please, don't prove yourself to me by calling me and hanging up at the most unreal hours of the morning. Get a grip and grow up.
And I'm looking for inspiration for my Sunday School class. And looking for jobs. And looking to relax. And looking to spend time with my loved ones. Work in progress.
Work in progress.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Happy Birthday To Me!
Ok, so it's my birthday. The 16th. I turn the victoriously lame and uneventful 23. I don't mind though. I'm not huge on birthdays anymore. I remember being a kid thinking from one birthday to the next. Constantly planning all the cool things that we could do, but every year, I always decided (to my Mom's relief) to have a sleepover with my girl friends. We'd do cake and stuff, but most of them were fairly laid back. I do remember a few where we'd go fun places and do fun and crazy things. I think those were the ones that wore my Mom out.
So here, on my birthday this year, I'm not going out to the bars. I'm not having cake. I'm not doing anything special. In fact, I'm heading to the police department to be the ride home and then going to bed early. The cool thing is, Wednesday is the camping trip. Yay!
This camping trip kind of sprung up on me. I know we've been planning it for a long time, but it was one of those things that we decided on quickly and sat down to plan weeks ago. Then everything else in the world happened and I didn't have any time to focus on this trip. Between hopping back and forth across state lines, it's been hard to remember my days. Now it seems like it's coming up fast and I haven't done anything to plan for it. Hopefully, all the reservations are still valid and we get to see what we want to.
Wish us luck!
So here, on my birthday this year, I'm not going out to the bars. I'm not having cake. I'm not doing anything special. In fact, I'm heading to the police department to be the ride home and then going to bed early. The cool thing is, Wednesday is the camping trip. Yay!
This camping trip kind of sprung up on me. I know we've been planning it for a long time, but it was one of those things that we decided on quickly and sat down to plan weeks ago. Then everything else in the world happened and I didn't have any time to focus on this trip. Between hopping back and forth across state lines, it's been hard to remember my days. Now it seems like it's coming up fast and I haven't done anything to plan for it. Hopefully, all the reservations are still valid and we get to see what we want to.
Wish us luck!
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