The Great Ambiguous Dichotomy

I'm trying to decide if I feel overwhelmed or just whelmed. Can I be just whelmed?

I work from early morning hours to noon, go to class for an hour, then go back to work. I go home, shower and eat, go to class. Come home, do homework, sleep and repeat. You'd think that this would be overbearing and stressful. So far it's not. Yet, I can't help feeling this emotion I can't quite describe. It's there, but not at the same time. My philandering philosophy professor said once that today's society is so fucked up that everyone assumes that they are either depressed, depressed and overly medicated on experimental drugs that make them pretend they are happy, or they assume that they must always be happy or there is something wrong with them and they pick one of the other options to wallow in self pity. I'm not sure I entirely agree, but how is it that now when I'm not "happy" and bouncing off the walls with joy that I think there is something else wrong with me? Somehow I managed to fit into the mold instead of going against the grain.

Sidenote of the evening: I miss talking to Jordan. I know he's out there somewhere. Last I knew, months ago, he was in Iraq. Now my emails get sent back to me "undeliverable" and there hasn't been one single word from him. I wonder where he went. I hope he's okay.

Dichotomy. I think that is a great way to describe my emotions. I want something and I don't. I'm happy and I'm not. I'm tired and I'm.... I'm.... Yeah. A little bit of everything.