Plain Ridiculous

This week has been fairly fun for me. I've been doing a lot of "shadowing" for my job, but mostly hang around and talk to people. Keeps me busy when there isn't really much of anything I can actually do.

One of my ventures in shadowing took me along with one of the outreach staff to a college class to just speak with them on what resources are available through the county and such. I'm guessing it had something to do with the fact that when I was in college, EVERY semester, someone like this co-worker would come to ALL of my classes and give talks, but I was kinda dumbfounded that no one had ever even heard of any of the resources she was presenting. Kinda surprising, but inspiring too because we want to share info to everyone.

I suppose I should say here that this blog is about to get really opinionated. If you aren't in the mood to continue, don't.

The topic of this particular presentation was on stereotypes and their relationship to violence. One of the big points that we hope people come away with is that it is never the victim's fault. It is not something they ask for, it is not something they want, and it is not okay. SO, as my co-worker is giving this presentation, we came to the question that many people need to hear debunked:

Does the clothing the victim is wearing matter?

I want to throw it out there that the answer is wholeheartedly NO.

I have to admit that I was offended and appalled that the TEACHER of this said class kept saying it does. Her point [which is true] is that society teaches us appropriate attire for our surroundings. I agree. We learn what to wear to interviews, we learn what to wear in the workplace, we learn what to wear to a football game, and yes, we learn what to wear to a bar. BUT, here's the kicker. Did anything you were wearing have printed on it, "RAPE ME"?

Her point was that when girls skank out and get all fluffed up for the bar get assaulted, they asked for it.

Nope. If girls go out looking for a one night stand, cool. Congratulations, you just did something that I can't say I'd ever do. BUT, then that is consensual. They chose to bring that creeper from the bar home and show them their front door, which is the difference between an awkward morning walk of shame and an assault.

Statistics show that the majority of assaults happen outside of that environment and that it is NOT about the clothes you wear. And to assume that it was all about the clothes, how can you explain that off to the significant majority of victims that were in their own homes? And WHY in your right mind would you ever blame a victim like that? How could you ever explain that away? It isn't like the police ask you how short your skirt was when they come to help; they ask for any clothing available for evidence.

So if I wasn't frustrated enough at this teacher, she blew my mind at the next question. My co-worker decided that she's change the scenario.

Imagine that you are at home, it is getting late and you're getting tired. You doze off on the couch watching tv and at some random hour you wake up and go to bed. But crap, in your sleepy haze, you didn't even realize that the front door was still unlocked. In the middle of the night, someone breaks into your home through your unlocked door and rapes you. Who's at fault?

The teacher had the GUTS to shrug and say, "Well...... you did leave the door unlocked."

Bitch. I was pissed off. Just because you left the door unlocked, DOES NOT give anyone the RIGHT to enter your home without permission. It also DOES NOT give them the right to assault you.

Grrr... I could have punched her. LOL.

It's About Time.

Jeez. Where have I been lately?! What is wrong with me?! Apparently, I'm a complete slacker and haven't been online. LOL.

That's entirely a lie.

But I have been really busy and working on the MANY changes this summer brought with it. In the last week:

Love and I got our MARRIAGE LICENSE!!

Finalized LOTS of wedding details!!

Picked up my WEDDING DRESS!!

I started my brand new JOB!! [in my new office! with green walls! and my own desk! and computer!]


The only downside, is apparently I haven't completely adjusted to the switch of days over nights... and I am AWAKE at 4am most mornings. Suck.